Your life is not lying in wait in the future like a wild animal or some ominous destiny. Nor is it hidden in the heavens, like a paradise or promise. Nor is it shut up in the cave or the prison of your past. It is here and now; it is what you live and what you do. At the heart of being; at the heart of the present; at the heart of everything – in the great current of life, of reality.
Andre Comte-Sponville

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

**New Blog**

I've started a new blog, combining my weight loss journey and my journey living life with my family!  This will be the last post here, but I've imported this blog into my new blog, so all my posts from this blog will be in the new one.  New blog is:

http://mamashan.blogspot.com/2012/05/welcome.html

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

**Tweens**

Having a 'tween is hard, and I imagine have a teenager is going to be even harder, but maybe all the drama will be over by then!  Hey, I can hope!  I'm finding that one of the hardest parts of dealing with these difficult tween years is that families handle issues differently, and that can affect the whole family - not just the kids.  My relationships have been changing because of what has been going on with the kids, but, I guess, I'm not surprised.  We're all very involved with our kids.  I don't know if that's just because we're homeschooling families, or not.  I know I dealt with so much of the same drama with my friends when I was growing up, but I never talked to my parents about it.

I remember in 4th or 5th grade a girl named Madonna started a club, and she decided she didn't want me in it, so every day at recess and lunch I had to sit alone because everyone else was allowed in the club. It was hell.  And there was always girls talking bad about other girls, and being mean, just for shits and giggles. Junior high was even worse - the worst two years, ever!  I was in the "popular" group, but it was not fun.  Our "leader" was not a nice girl, and she would always be picking on one of us.  She had bullies be mean to us - I would get shoved up against my locker, often, by the bullies.  There were many days when I was scared to go to school.  Or she would decide that no one in our group was allowed to talk to one member...for no reason, at all - she just enjoyed being mean.  And you never knew when she was going to pick you, but when she did it was awful.  No one would talk me, or look at me, and it would be a very, lonely few days.  So many things like this happened, but I never mentioned anything to my parents, and I have no idea why, but it's not like that with my kids.

My girls tell me everything, so when they are hurt, upset, worried, mad - anything - I know about it, and, of course, I get involved because they are asking for my help.  Sometimes I just try to guide them so they can work it out alone, but sometimes that doesn't work, so I have to step in, and, at times, even that doesn't help the situation because here's the thing.....all families are different.  How I'm raising my kids is not how other people are raising their kids, and vice versa.  Do I think I'm doing it right?  Of course!  Do they think they're doing it right?  Of course!  What works for some, doesn't work for others, so every family is going to deal with issues in their own way, and our ways are not always going to be same, so how I expect my kids to handle a problem is not always going to be how another parent wants their kids to handle the same problem, and that's hard, but it's unavoidable.  So, all I can do is guide my girls in my way, and, also, help them to understand that other families have different ways of doing things, and that their way is not wrong - it's just not how we do things.

There's been a bit of drama going on the last few months (or year...or two) - some of it my kid created (which I have no problem admitting), and some of it other kids created, but, I think, my girl and I are, finally, getting a hold on it.  She's been working hard the last couple weeks at not being so sensitive about stuff, and to not be looking for issues that aren't there, and we've been talking alot about how to deal with her friends when they are behaving in a way that she can't control.  She's going to try hard to remember that she can only control herself and her actions, so I have hope that things are going to be better.

At times, I envy the totally, oblivious parents out there that have no idea what is going on in their children's lives because I know life would be less stressful if I was one of those parents, BUT, for the most part, I'm glad that I have such a close relationship with my girls, and that they want to share everything with me, and I'm happy that they realize I'm always here for them.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

I demolish my bridges behind me…then there is no choice but forward. 
~ Firdtjof Nansen

Friday, January 20, 2012

**The Little Things**

Oh my gosh, I just found out that The Wonder Years is available on Netflix for instant streaming!  Remember The Wonder Years??


Come on?  Who didn't love The Wonder Years?!

I'm so excited!  I used to watch this show all the time!  Netflix has all six seasons, so it's going to be a fun weekend!  I can't wait for my girls to see it!

It's the little things in life, ya know? :)

Saturday, January 14, 2012

**Letting Go**

I'm feeling the need to move on from some people in my life - not to be mean or vengeful, just so that I can have less stress, and more peace in my life.  I can't change people, and some people don't want to change, or can't change, because they can't see who they are, or how they affect others.  Also, sometimes relationships don't work out because people don't "fit", and that's just life.  So, I'm letting go, and I won't be looking back.

"Letting go doesn't mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be." ~ Anon

Monday, January 2, 2012

**2012**

Another new year...already!  2011 zipped by, didn't it?  This is what I blogged at the beginning of 2011:

Time really does fly! My girls are 10 and 7 1/2 already, and this time with them is precious, so I look forward to this year ahead with them - watching them live, grow, and learn.
In 2011, I, also, hope to get healthy by eating healthful foods and moving more. I hope to spend more alone time with my husband. I hope to continue to spend time with friends. I hope to spend more time with my parents, my sister and her boys. I hope to take more field trip with my girls. I hope to read more books. I hope to blog more.



I did get a bit more healthy in 2011.  I lost almost 30 pounds, and I exercise on a regular basis now.  I did spend more time with my nephews - I made lots of visits to their house, and they spent the night with us, at least, once a month.  Unfortunately, I don't feel like I spent a whole lot of time with my parents and my sister, so I'm going to keep working on this.  I, definitely, spent less time on my friendships this year (dealing with busy schedules and, also, some other issues), but I'm hoping to work on these friendships.  I did not have much alone time with my husband.  He is VERY busy with work, but we need to make our relationship a priority, so this is, definitely, something we need to work on.  I, obviously, spend alot of time with my girls already, but I want to work on spending more individual time with each of the girls, which was a goal I did not meet last year, so I'll be working on this, too.


I feel like 2012 is going to be another busy year, BUT that doesn't mean it has to be a stressful one.  I just need to learn to throw in some fun on the busy days, so the stress doesn't get the best of us, which can sometimes happen.  I'm looking forward to this year - it's going to be good!





Saturday, December 24, 2011

**Happy Holidays**

This is my wish for you: peace of mind, prosperity through the year, happiness that multiplies, health for you and yours, fun around every corner, energy to chase your dreams, joy to fill your holidays!
~ D.M. Dellinger